Jane's Jottings

I have known a local octogenarian for 3 years.  She is a fellow émigrée, though from a different European nation from me.  We have gradually become friends, and share our thoughts on the world at large, the discussion of which includes politics, societal norms – past and present – and generally what is going on in our lives. 

To me, this woman is loveable because she has a ready sense of humor, often laughing at herself; she has maintained an open mind and exercised the pursuit of interests into her dotage, including travel all around the world; she is a very logical individual who thinks and analyzes soundly; she is observant (that goes hand in hand with interest in what is around her), and she is kind.  I will also say that this lady is practical and pragmatic. 

Many experiences have made my friend sensible and realistic.  I have no doubt that she was born with a very “capable” personality, though I also believe that life’s elements and challenges have shaped her further into the successfully independent person she is.  

This is not her real name, but here, I am going to call my friend “Irmgard”.  Irmgard was born in Germany the year that World War II broke out.  Her mother relocated through necessity to a different part of Germany with Irmgard and her brother.  The man of the family was away at war.  There are things that German civilians suffered about which we know very little, if anything at all, because the German people were very ashamed after the end of WWII; they shared as little as possible about the challenges that they had encountered during the war. 

One thing I learned about Irmgard was that she and her family did not receive as much help from the German government as some did because they were Lutherans.  Catholics, on the other hand, who followed the state religion, were helped much more.  Consequently, even looking back at history, Irmgard still recognizes the injustice of inequality.  She is not bitter about it, just reflective of realities.

There is another German woman who lives in our area – we shall call her Hannah.  Hannah’s family was Catholic, and therefore experienced a rather different wartime existence from Irmgard’s family.  When Irmgard and Hannah talk about their background beginnings, it is clear that the disparities in their lives impressed almost opposite histories upon them, although they lived through the same war. 

A specific element plays into the big picture of Irmgard’s experience.  After WWII, she had family in what became East Germany.  When Irmgard traveled east of the Berlin wall to visit distant relatives, she was subjected to intense scrutiny by the authorities – as was everyone visiting from the West.  It was the norm to be questioned about one’s comings and goings, planned activities during the visit, what one did for a living, and how much money one had with them.  To have been connected by blood to East Germany and then be treated as the enemy must have been horrendous.  From what I gather, it sounds like the East German authorities were worse than the actual Soviets.  But that strikes me as the usual way when an invaded people wants to survive and prosper under a foreign invader.  

Lately, we have encountered intermittent stormy weather, as is usual for the season and this location.  I love to sleep to thunder, wind and rain, all of which I find relaxing to listen to.  Irmgard does not at all enjoy these weather elements at night.  I shared with her about my seasonal affective disorder, and how the light-dark phenomenon works both ways in context.  During the darker days of winter, I fall into a sort of funk, and must find activities to distract me from the shorter days, with less daylight.  Conversely, at nighttime, I need to sleep in a very dark room, without light pollution intruding into my bedroom.  I need daytime light, but I also need nighttime darkness. 

Irmgard told me that she prefers to have access to some light during the night, and this often means leaving a curtain partially open.  This is especially true when she is traveling; finding one’s way around a strange hotel room at night  amounts to safety.  Irmgard typically stays in hotels that are historic pieces of architecture, and you might imagine the various overhangs and protrusions associated with such antiquity.  

It occurred to me that Irmgard may well prefer less clamorous weather at nighttime, and some light to guide her path, because she lived through the noise of war and the need to move to a safer place at a moment’s notice.  She has not stated this; it is something I surmise, given her background experiences.  

These encounters that I have highlight the myriad ways in which individuals on this earth experience life.  We acknowledge that there are many differences, as a matter of course, yet we can only imagine how vast and numerous those varied exposures are.

I appreciate the ability to see things from someone else’s perspective, to catch a glimpse of life through their eyes.  The practice brings interest, reflection, greater awareness, and – sometimes – it leaves us a little wiser.

Irmgard once joked that it was nice for us to be friends, given the fact that we were once enemies (our nations).  My response?  “Not in my lifetime.”  I also pointed out that Brits (specifically English) and Germans go back much farther than WWI and WWII; German Saxons invaded Britain and became part of our DNA.  The old tribal connections last eternally.  

Walk through life with your eyes and ears wide open, and you will enrich your experience, and strengthen your soul.